“All I’ve done is run fast. I don’t see why people should make much fuss about that” – Fanny Blankers Koen, Dutch athlete, 1948 Summer Olympics
I love the Olympics. I especially love the Winter Olympics. From the opening ceremony to the closing ceremony and as much curling in between as I can possibly watch, I am a huge Olympic fan. Sports that I have not seen for four years….sports I know hardly anything about….athletes that I’ve never heard of..it does not matter. I get into every event like its the most captivating thing on earth. The past two nights I have stayed up till midnight to watch figure skating. Figure skating. I almost have myself convinced that I need the $75 dollar wool knit Ralph Lauren hat worn by the American team during the opening ceremonies (this would instantly become the single most expensive piece of clothing that I own save for hunting apparel) Basically the Olympics are my March Maddness.
And why not? There is still so much snow outside that as I can’t even open my office window. Its still dark way too early. There’s nothing else going on. So if the whole rest of the world wants to throw the biggest sporting event on the planet, you’re darn right I’m going to tune in and become captivated by all the different flags and nations and personalities that come out. I’m flat out upset that I can’t watch curling during the day on msnbc like I could back in college during the Salt Lake Olympics. I’m going into curling withdraw. Any idea what that’s like? I thought not.
The Olympics also provide a bit of an escape from what is fast becoming a horrendous complaint season at work. See, I deal with complaints. Its not a high and mighty part of the job. Its not a part of the job that a graduate degree gives you the slightest idea how to handle. But part of zoning and planning is enforcing the rules. Everything from high grass to abandoned cars to work without a permit to…….snow on a sidewalk. Yup, the height of temporary weather induced misery. Let me explain:
Step 1. Have a blizzard
Step 2. Have a second blizzard 3 days later.
Step 3. Road plows come through and dump enormous amounts of snow on the side of the road and onto public sidewalks.
Step 4. Reference Section 117-1 of the Municipal Codified Ordinances which states a 24″ wide path shall be cleared on a public sidewalk within 8 hours of the end of a snow event. (kind of difficult for the elderly, the single moms, and people who are just lazy to accomplish)
Step 5. Get complaints from people who claim their neighbors surely want school children on their way to bus stops to die horrible deaths in the middle of the street because said people are not clearing their sidewalks and the death of children is the only possible motive
Step 6. Put on your public policy hat, throw away the philosophy, and get dirty.
Lest you think this is a topic that can be avoided by a higher calling, once residents get done with me they then call their state congressmen and complain all over again. So you can be at the top or the bottom of the totem pole in this kind of weather, its not going to matter. I’ve talked to two local state reps who are getting flooded with these complaint calls.
So with that to deal with I’m going to go door to door with a violation list and think about how I could be training for the US Bobsled team.
